Mommys Broken Christmas

On Christmas Day after our wonderful Christmas Dinner with the family I do what I always do, take down the Christmas stuff. Now some of you may say thats bad luck, and after this year I thought twice about it but I say thats crap. I have always done it. When the holiday is over I want all decorations and evidence that it was around gone. I took down the lights outside on our house, the tree, the stockings, the garland on the banister…. everything! Everything was down and in the boxes ready to be stored. I do this because I believe it helps with depression. I dont like waking up the next day to clean up the mess. Or wait with that huge tree in the way until the new year. Thats foolish to me. 

Well….. you may be thinking  Im the foolish one now but as I was taking down the boxes that I had just packed ever so careful I stepped on a present that was left on the stairs and I fell. I fell hard. As I fell I heard a snap in my ankle. I was wearing my leg high boots while I did this, I fell into the box I was carrying down the rest of the 6 steps. I knew right away something was wrong. I was in so much pain. I yelled for Ben. My brother in law Aaron had stayed after the party to chat and him and Ben ran down after me. 
When they pulled the boot off while I screamed Ciara (who is obsessed with Doc Mcstuffins right now and talks about being a doctor and got new doctor stuff for Christmas) says “Let me get the big book of boo boos!” This saying comes from her favorite show. I hurt so bad but she made me laugh and kiss her sweet face. I called my mom to come watch the kids. Before she got there Ben and Aaron helped me up the stairs and to the car to go to the ER. I was shaking so bad. It started swelling instantly. Aaron stayed with the kids until my mom got there. 
Ben took me to the hospital. They were busy so I waited 2 hours before they saw me. X-rays showed that I cracked my fibula. I had to see a specialist. They gave me some painkillers, a splint and some crutches. 
I saw the specialist. It was cracked so badly that I needed surgery. They squeezed me in on the 30th of December right before the new year. I had 7 screws and a plate put in. The pain from that knocked me out for 2 weeks. I was on heavy painkillers. My parents brought in a mattress and bed to put where my dinning room table was because I cant move to get to my room. This was the most hard things I have ever been through. I had people in my house for two whole weeks. I couldn’t watch my kids alone, painkillers knocked me out and I could not get around. I was in a splint after surgery for 2 and a half weeks. Then a bright pink cast for 4 weeks. 

Depression has really gotten the best of me during this time. I feel so helpless and unimportant. I miss my kids so much. Most of our days are spent in front of the television since I cant take them anywhere. I have taken one day at a time. 

Christmas 2013

Day Before Christmas Eve

This was a huge day for us. Ben and I went out the night before. We didnt really have a reason to shop but we decided to have a date and buy one more toy. We went out to the mall and looked at the beautiful lights. I felt very carefree this night. Still and quiet. It started snowing lightly and it was beautiful. 

Christmas Eve

The kids made their cookies for Santa. Caleb and Ciara are at the perfect age right now to enjoy Santa the very most. Ciara was able to participate in everything this year. Our theme this year for some weird reason was mustaches. That day we delivered a bag of gold to our friends with a note that said “In the Spirit of the season I wanted to share some of mustache with you. Merry Mustache!” Just a silly way to say Merry Christmas. The kids loved putting those together. We got a pretty good Christmas bonus and we had saved up so we had a really good Christmas this year. The kids slept downstairs in our room while my parents slept in Calebs room upstairs. We set our our thank you cards for Santa with the cookies and a full glass of egg nog. 
Santa had a pretty late night. He had to set everything out and blow up that pool for the ball pit. But it was so much fun!!! We only stayed up till midnight. 🙂
Christmas Day
We made the kids wait downstairs until we were ready and then let them come up and see what Santa had done for them. At first they were a little overwhelmed. We didnt wrap everything so they could see some stuff. Caleb had 4 big bionicles set out around his presents. The big present he wanted was the skylanders swap force and those bionicles. They are made by lego and they are pretty costly. I have a girlfriend whos boys have grown out of them so I bought their older ones. 

Ciara wanted a kitchen, a unicorn, and heals with makeup stuff. And Curtis got a ball pit and lots of learning toys. We sat him in the ball pit and he was pretty much happy sitting in there while the older kids unwrap their presents. Ben got a BYU hat and an iPad. Mommy also got an iPad and bath and body whole kit. 
I bought toys throughout the months leading up to Christmas and forgot what I bought. They were shipped much later so I we ended up with way more toys then we thought. I think this will be the last year that we go all out like we did. The kids eventually got tired of unwrapping and just wanted to play. 
After the presents
We host the Christmas dinner so after we open everything and look at it all we clean up, move furniture, and set out tables and chairs. Poor Ben got the job of deflating the pool that “Santa” had blown up by mouth only a few hours earlier. 
This year our table looked beautiful. We picked out an ornament for each person in the Payne family and put it in a little stocking with their name on it and a bag of loot with our Merry Mustache greeting. We ordered a very large ham from Honey baked ham and some beef and it was amazing!!! Its my new favorite thing is eating that ham! It was beautiful. I think everyone enjoyed themselves. Jake called to video chat with us, his mission is almost over. Grandma Gardner joined us this year! It was a fantastic dinner. 

And then there was after…… (Next post)

Curtis Eating… Its that Great!

Curtis is 7 months in this great month of December and I am obsessed with this kid feeding himself! Thats right! He wants nothing to do with his mama feeding him anymore. He loves life. And I have kind of gone crazy taking pictures of him eating but he is so stinkin happy when he eats! My favorite thing to feed him is anything with noodles. He can get a good grip on it and it gets super messy! Any and every chance I get I give this kid something to make that sweet little face of his messy. 

Another Zoo Trip

Yes there are many places to visit and lots of things to do in the great state of Utah but the zoo is one thing we do at least once a year. This year my girlfriend told me about a free day! How did I not know about such a terrific thing?? Lesson learned. Anyway we went as a big group and it was so much fun! Isnt everything better with friends? Hehe lots of questions in this post.

A new thing they have are the sea lions. Those guys are so much fun to watch. They have little seats there as well so the kids can take a break and watch these amazing creatures swim back and forth. This was Curtis’s first trip to the zoo. As always he was perfectly happy the whole time. Sitting in the stroller with a huge grin on his face. It was a little chilly since it was November but still lots of things to see.

 Isn’t Caleb the greatest Poser ever!!?!

Thanksgiving 2013

My sister and brother in law hosted a fantastic Thanksgiving dinner this year. She hosted all the Payne family and her side of the family as well. It was complete with activities with the kids like taking extra food to the fire fighters and making little crafts. Everyone enjoyed their time. 
Kaiah and Ciara are still the best of friends. It seems like they cant get enough of each other. 
Every Tuesday the library hosts a story time and the week before Thanksgiving they did a theme about turkeys complete with turkey hats. Ciara loves story time 🙂

Stud Muffin and Drama Queen

Almost always when I snap a picture of Caleb he is holding someone. If there is a baby around he is holding them. When he comes home from school he holds Curtis for a while. He is doing so well in school and he is so popular right now. He tells me about several girls that he totally flirts with and gets very shy when he talks about them. He is my little stud muffin. His most favorite thing right now are his new cowboy boots. He wears them everywhere! I think he likes the heal in the back. He picked those cowboy boots without any say from his mama… he picked them all on his own! 
Ciara has been having a hard time going to school. I think its because she knows the baby gets to stay home with me alone and that makes her a little mad. But she throws fits as we are going to school. Its now a tradition to go get a small ice cream cone after school if she didnt cry or make a fuss that day. Its gotten much better. Time outs dont work well anymore either. Instead she has to sit in her room for a while and cool off. Time outs never really worked with Caleb, we just told him how sad it made us when he made a poor choice. Time outs worked for a while with Ciara, she would calm down and tell us how sorry she was. But now it takes much longer and the temptation of leaving the corner is to great. Everything with Ciara is overdone. When she is sad she is overly sad and the world is over but when she is happy you cant be sad around her. She lights up everyone. She is a true princess at heart. 

These are a few of Curtis’s favorite things

Curtis at 6 Months

He has recently discovered how to sit up. I like  to put pillows behind him because he still leans backward. He is the most independent child I have. Instead of being held all the time he would much rather sit and play. Ciara has a little pink car that she has almost grown out of and when we brought that in Curtis went right after it. Its his new favorite toy and it keeps him entertained for hours.

His sleeping has gotten so much better. We cuddle him to sleep and then set him in his cradle until 4am when he wakes up and wants to cuddle again. He is so sweet when he cuddles. He rubs his little hand across my chest or my face.

Curtis lets Daddy put his hat on him. Im not sure why Daddy loves to do this so much but he does, and Curtis smiles real big for him. He likes to stand at the edge of the couch and play with toys on the couch. When I cook dinner I set him in the kitchen on the floor and let him play with the pots and pans and he loves making banging noises. He is the happiest baby I have ever known.